


Of Gods

by NevillesGran



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Gen, Multi, Post-Canon, The Homestuck Epilogues
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-21
Updated: 2019-06-21
Packaged: 2020-05-15 17:20:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,146
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19300282
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NevillesGran/pseuds/NevillesGran
Summary: Here is a story: the gods were mortal, once. They made the world and then they stepped into it, and for a while, they were humans and trolls. They had to adjust, you see, before they found their divinity again.(This isn’t really accurate, but it’s good enough for a story!)





	Of Gods

**Author's Note:**

> Andrew Hussie spent several hundred thousand words to say "fanfiction writer rights", so here's my take on his take.

Here is a story: the gods were mortal, once. They made the world and then they stepped into it, and for a while, they were humans and trolls. They had to adjust, you see, before they found their divinity again.

(This isn’t really accurate, but it’s good enough for a story!)

The Prince of Heart was the first to Ascend, because it was his nature to be every aspect of himself at once, and to do it well. The Soulbreaker, the Unifier, the Headless God. He promptly declared himself the villain of the tale, brought the Seer of Light to Ascension as well, under his sway, and generally set off a series of events that can only, in retrospect, be described as “shenanigans.” Particularly dark, agency-inhibiting, sometimes bloody shenanigans, but shenanigans nevertheless. History cleans up a lot of stains.

The Seer of Light, as discussed, was the second to Ascend. Lady Fate, Chance-Seer, the Rainbringer. For a while, she was under the influence of the Prince. Then the Knight of Time caught up, and the Maid of Time, and several other friends including (most importantly) the Seer’s wife, and it turned out that True Love’s Kiss really can do wonders to wake a sleeping mind. Also, a chainsaw. The chainsaw really helped. 

The Knight of Time Ascended third. Kind of. The Swordmaster, the Preserver, the King of Clocks, he came from another timeline and found himself in this one, and, once they figured out how to sort  _that_  out, proceeded to kick serious ass and spit radical rhymes for eternity. 

Fourth Ascended the Witch of Space, out of sheer fucking irritation at being left out. The Worldbringer, the Canine Creator, the Queen of Stars. In the breath between the Muse’s control and the Prince’s sleep, she blazed forth like a sun and took her place among the ultimate divine. Hers is the cold winter frost and the first breath of spring.

There was a lull, then. The gods had all eternity to reach their potential, after all, and mortal life was so sweet.

The lovely Rogue of Void Ascended quietly, opening their eyes between one thought and the next. Lord Unknown, the Masked Goddess, the Void Where Gender Goes To Be, Like, Whatevs. Like the Knight but with the silence of a rogue, she slipped into the shadows in one world and found himself in another, and as one brought forth all the possibilities of the darkness between the stars.

The Seer of Mind Ascended on the edge of the universe, hand in hand with the Thief of Light. Lady Justice, the Blind Seer, the Dragonblade. She had been divine for some time, since the Knight of Time nipped into a different timeline to fetch her bed from the center of a moon. It had been a rush job, on account of how much she was bleeding at the time, but she Rose Up just fine. Then she went looking for her sister.

The Thief of Light Ascended on the edge of the universe, hand in hand with the Seer of Mind. The Gambler, the Hero of the Tale, the Spider8itch. She fought her way across the boundaries of fate and canon to find her sister (who had been doing the same, but less noisily). When at last they met, they went on a road trip. Eventually, standing together at the edge of everything that could be, they both opened their eyes and saw (and smelled) it all.

No one knows when the Maid of Time Ascended. The First Fairy, the Corpsetaker, Our Lady of Ghosts. She goes where and when she will, everywhen there is someone or something that can die, and at her side, the Two-Eyed Ghost. He never bothered to track down a new body to die in and become something greater, because, honestly, why bother.

The Knight of Blood Ascended when he was old and even grumpier. The Unchained, the Pulsekeeper, the Shouting God. The Rogue himself brought forth a bed for him to lie upon, and when he sat up, he was reluctantly Risen, and young-looking again. Several centuries after  _that_ , he opened his eyes to Ascend fully in a fit of pique. 

The Maid of Life Ascended in a shouting fight with the Page of Hope. The Healer, the Cake Queen, Her Magnanimousity. She was queen of everything. She sat on her red throne and all that she surveyed, she owned. There were no more markets left to conquer (and so many lives so short in the wake of those she had.) (She wondered, in darker moments, if Dave Strider had had a point after all about the dangers of neoliberalism.) She knew that she was right; she opened her eyes to see more and prove it, and found their friends and family waiting.

The Page of Hope Ascended in a shouting fight with the Maid of Life. The Light in Darkness, the Lord of Joy, the Adventurer. He was ever a beacon, no matter how dark the world grew. She didn’t believe in him, but he believed in himself, so he opened his eyes to prove it, and found their friends and family waiting.

The Sylph of Space lived a long, long,  _long_  unlife, and Ascended directly from her final death bed. The Mender, the Mother of All, the Lesbian Chainsaw Vampire Fashionista Goddess We Deserve. The Seer of Light pushed a stake through her heart and bit her own lip to bleeding before kissing her, and the Sylph Rose Up and Ascended in one elegant step.

The Thief of Life has never achieved Ascension, though she did steal her way to divinity. The Wandering Queen, the Golden Thief, she...well, she is even harder to stop from getting everywhere and doing anything than the Maid of Time. It’s possible she can be killed, but no one has managed it. 

The Heir of Breath was last to Ascend. The Windwalker, the Friendleader, the Boy in Blue. The Seers saw a path and the Witch and Rogue rent the way; the Thief of Light took her favorite option and Knight of Time crossed the lines, held the Heir by the shoulders, and said, “John, I’m definitely gay—well, bi—but that isn’t why I’m about to do what I’m about to do. Except kind of, because it helps that I’m comfortable enough—know what, never mind. It’s symbolic, okay?” And the Heir didn’t have enough time to finish saying, “Dave! Holy shit, you’re-” before the Knight kissed him on the forehead and showed him the way home at last.

And that is how we got all the gods!

Oh, the Muse of Space? The nice one, that is—she never Ascended, no, nor even Rose Up. But cherubs live a  _very_  long time, particularly when they are surrounded by such great friends and family. So she did jUst fine. ~_u


End file.
